Talking alone with a girl is difficult, but when you increase that audience, it becomes extremely difficult. Keep reading if you want to learn how to approach a girl who is in a group more safely and to find interesting conversation topics.
Approach a girl in a group
Evaluate group dynamics. It is not always appropriate to approach all groups. One of the girls in the group has just finished a relationship and the rest is supporting her? Are they talking about work or does one of them have a sick relative? Listen to their conversation without being obvious.
- If you are talking about a serious issue, it is best not to talk to her. If you are talking about something light or funny, it is probably safe to proceed.
Be part of the group. The first step to talking with any group is to integrate without being too obvious. Wait at the right moment or until you hear something interesting, so they do not feel that you are getting into the conversation. Act as part of the group without invading their space.
- It’s okay to say something if you do it kindly. Ask questions related to the topic. Say “I’m lost, what are we talking about? Give me all the details.”
- Do not stop by a group of strangers to listen to their conversation. You’ll look like a weird guy and the girl will not want to know anything about you.
Join the conversation. Listen to their conversation and make contributions to what they are saying. Use in your favor the topics that the group is talking about.
- If necessary, introduce yourself.
- Talk to the whole group of girls. Do not try to concentrate immediately on the specific girl. Depending on the girl, she might worry about offending her friends or feeling bad about not receiving the same amount of attention.
Start a parallel conversation with the girl. After starting a conversation related to what the group is talking about, make a slow transition to just talking to the girl you are interested in. Turn to her and make eye contact. What you say should be directed towards her, not towards the group.
- Start making small comments that the rest of the group cannot hear. Keeping her interested in what you have to say will distract her from the rest of the group and eventually make her focus more on you.
Keep talking. As time goes by, the group may leave them alone to talk, which will make it much easier to have a conversation in private. Ask lots of questions and keep eye contact so that you feel that you are talking specifically with her.
- If they do not leave, be sure to include other people in the group in your conversation so they do not feel ignored. However, be sure to keep the conversation fun to have a chance to talk to the girl while keeping the conversation entertained. Most girls find it great that the boys are friendly with their friends.
If it does not work, do not insist. Sometimes, the best technique is to talk for a while and then move on. Keep making eye contact with the girl you want to talk to. This can be an excellent way to see if you are interested in continuing to talk with you. Is he separated from the group and will he look for you? Excellent signal
- If they do not meet again, wait until the end of the night. When your group is leaving, separate it and tell it you had a great time. Tell her you’d love to see her again for a coffee or a drink.
Know what to say
Ask more questions than comments. What interests this group? What do you like? As they are? If this group was a dessert, what dessert would it be? Find fun and light conversation topics about the interests of the group and the girl. Here are some examples of questions you can ask if you do not know the group well:
- How did you meet?
- How often do they look?
- What drinks did they ask? Which is the best?
Listen to them and let the conversation flow with your answers. The conversations consist of finding doors and opening them. Listen to what they have to say and respond to the topic in a positive and friendly way with a contribution of their own. If the group is talking about a movie, ask what they think about it. If someone says “Bored” say “Oh yes, what movies do you like?”. Keep the conversation flowing and positive to show that you are an interesting person with whom this girl should want to talk.
- The ability to take advantage of a response from the interlocutor to make the dialogue flow is one of the most important parts of a conversation. No one can talk to a stranger without listening to what he has to say and responding to it.
Keep diverting the group’s attention to the girl you want to converse with. If someone in the group is giving their opinion on a specific topic, turn to the girl you are interested in and ask “What do you think?” This is an excellent way to help break the ice while you include it. It is also a good way to let others know that you are interested in talking specifically with this girl.
Search something in common. If you know you are in a specific club, you like a particular band or you are especially interested in something, concentrate your conversation on asking about that topic. Ask her how long she has been interested in that hobby, why she likes it and let the conversation lead her to discover more about her and what they have in common.
Tell him more about you The conversations are reciprocal. If you just talk about it, you may feel that you are being invasive. So after asking a question about her, think of something that has to do with her answer and say it.
- Additionally, do not talk only about yourself. Self-centeredness is not very attractive.
Be positive. When you talk to a group, try to keep things light and positive. Encourage others to give their opinion and laugh at their jokes. Do not interrupt others or show too much in disagreement with a group initially, at least until you are familiar with their dynamics.
- Many “seduction specialists” recommend subtle insults to generate attraction in a girl. This has different results, but it is always a bad idea to try it with a group of girls.
- The little jokes work well. But it’s different to say something flirtatious and slightly mocking like “I cannot believe you did not like Iron Man. Do not you have a soul? Prove to me that you have a soul” and tell a girl that her opinion on birth control is “childish” .
Be yourself. Do not try to show yourself as someone you are not to get their attention or pretend to be interested in things that do not matter to you. If it turns out that they do not have much in common, it is not the end of the world. Go in search of other groups and other conversations.
Forget the conquering phrases. First introduce yourself and shake your hand, then greet others. Ask if you can sit with them. He talks to everyone equally and shows a genuine interest in the things they say. That’s the way you should start a conversation with a group, not saying “Are those space pants?”.
- Do not try to show off with the group. It is more likely that the jokes and tricks cause you to end up with a drink on the face than with an invitation to drink coffee.
- Be confident! Try not to worry too much about how you look. Just worry about having a good conversation and everything will be fine.
- Memorize the names of all the people in the group.
- The best thing is always to ask if you can tell him something. This usually implies that you want to talk to her alone. You may tell your friends that you will catch up with them later or ask them to wait for you for a moment.
- Get close to her, but try not to get too close. Respect your personal space and be friendly! Most girls, even if they are not interested in you, will be willing to listen to you at least during a brief conversation.
- Do not interrupt the group. If the group is acting in a relaxed manner, talking at times and remaining silent for a while, approach quietly during a silence in the conversation. Say hello to the girl you want to talk to. It will surely try to decipher your intention, so think of something more to say besides “hello”. Ask her a question, compliment her, invite her to do something non-formal with you.
- If you do not have anything to say but you want to get their attention, walk close to her and smile while nodding slightly. If you realize that she is looking at you after having passed, wait a moment and it happens again but this time talk to her. You are likely to be willing to ignore your group to give you their full attention.